MDEV-5262, MDEV-5914, MDEV-5941, MDEV-6020: Deadlocks during parallel replication causing replication to fail.

After-review changes.

For this patch in 10.0, we do not introduce a new public storage engine API,
we just fix the InnoDB/XtraDB issues. In 10.1, we will make a better public
API that can be used for all storage engines (MDEV-6429).

Eliminate the background thread that did deadlock kills asynchroneously.
Instead, we ensure that the InnoDB/XtraDB code can handle doing the kill from
inside the deadlock detection code (when thd_report_wait_for() needs to kill a
later thread to resolve a deadlock).

(We preserve the part of the original patch that introduces dedicated mutex
and condition for the slave init thread, to remove the abuse of
LOCK_thread_count for start/stop synchronisation of the slave init thread).